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Tuesday, August 23, 2011

As long as I'm living my baby you'll be.... {Tillamook County Fair inspired photo session}

The first four months I was so sick I lost weight instead of gaining it. By the fifth month I was getting to feel better and not only did Josh and I start anticipating her entrance into the world but so did big brother Jesse. I couldn't wait till she arrived. When she arrived I couldn't wait to have her call me 'momma' or say 'brother'. I couldn't wait to have her run toward me like her big brother did clinging to my legs for safety. Then when I was so sleep deprived I couldn't wait for her to just sleep through one night.

And so the pattern continued. Can't wait for her to walk, to talk, to run.... how I wish I could go back and have a little sit down with my sleep deprived new mom self. Enjoy these moments, I would say. Take every minute in. truly focus on this time and enjoy it. for as much as everyone tells you they grow up too fast, it really is the truth.

When I think about this type of conversation I could have with my younger self, I realize that one day years from now, I may think the same thing about the stage we, as a family, are in now. It's so easy to be bogged down with the struggles that Naomi's ARS has brought.  It is tempting to pray that all this time just zooms by so that we can get all health issues taken care of.  It's so easy to wish years away.  But that is not the way we choose to live. 

Today we choose to enjoy the stuffed lizards phase (and every living creature out there too!). The making jewelery for hours on end phase, the girly phase. More importantly the Daddy's Girl phase. The would you cuddle me before I doze off phase because all too soon..... well, I won't even go there. A lump already grows in my throat thinking of how she grows and grows and there is nothing I can do to stop it.  So, what we choose to do instead is celebrate it! Celebrate her!

This one is dedicated to my darling Naomi. I love you sisi girl. In eight short years you have taught me so much more than anyone else could about being strong. Having faith. And choosing to be joyful. You inspire me. your daddy. everyone around you to live fully! You make me {Oh so proud} to be your momma, baby girl!


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